Gary Halbert – How To Write Copy That Sells

Gary Halbert was a well-known direct-response marketer and copywriter. His persona and approaches to marketing are highly regarded by modern-era digital marketers and copywriters. He’s had more multi-million dollar winning campaigns in different niches than any other copywriter — living or dead. 

Halbert is perhaps most famous for the Boron Letters – a series of letters he wrote to his son while imprisoned for tax fraud. A cult classic in the world of copywriting, in which Halbert wonders curiously about the ideas of making money, copywriting, family life, direct mail advertising, life philosophy, health, business and more.

This time I copyworked and analysed 8 of Gary Halbert’s ads, including his famous Coat of Arms letter and the subsequent ads (Amazing Money Making Secrets, Lead Gen, and Famous Dollar Letter).

As always, Halbert’s swipe file is at the bottom of the page.

Lesson 1: Use Everyday Language

“What is a good writer? Well, in my opinion, a good writer is one who makes things perfectly clear. He makes it easy for the reader. Easy-to-understand what he is saying, easy to keep reading.” – Gary Halbert

Halbert writes as he talks to achieve two things:

  • For the reader to understand what he writes.
  • For the reader to continue reading.

How?

  • Every section starts with 1~3 words that draw the reader’s attention, such as “Think about it”, “Look”, “By the way”, “Listen” and “That’s all there is to it.”
  • Every section ends with “…” whereby the header of the next section becomes the ending of the previous section. 
  • He frequently starts sentences with “And”.

All of this makes it easy to continue reading: there is no break until you reach the end of the letter.

Lesson 2: Storytelling And Everyday Situations

All of this only works if you keep the reader interested and engaged.
Halbert achieves this by engaging the reader’s imagination.

He comes up with names for his ideas or secrets and uses them repeatedly: “crazy letter idea”, “Remote Control Selling” and “Killer Advertising”.
The names make the reader chuckle and the repetition increases the memorability.

Halbert’s names generally include (1) a benefit and (2) the notion that it’s low-effort.

He makes the names sticky by backing them up with a story.
Halbert never explains, but always shares an experience. This not only makes him more relatable to the customer (= generates trust), but also shows the effort and experience he has gone through to come up with this product (= increases perceived value).

Halbert also tells everyday stories to simplify numbers and otherwise complex product features or to dispel a reader’s beliefs and scepticism.

His writing style combined with the use of personal stories keeps readers engaged, but what really makes them want to continue reading is his ability to raise the stakes. In the first third of every letter or ad, Halbert includes not just his struggle, but also what would have happened if he had failed…often a strong negative outcome (losing his job, being broke, etc).

Lesson 3: Value Proposition And Relevance To The Reader

That’s all well and good, but Halbert writes to sell, not to just tell a story.
He achieves this by:

  • Making his letter personally relevant to the reader, such as addressing him or her by name, using “I” and “you”. We’re more likely to consider something that is personally addressed to us.
  • Call out the desired type of reader with a question as soon as possible. Force readers to self-select.
  • Being different, such as attaching old coins or a dollar bill (masterful as it grabs attention + enhances the perceived result + reciprocity), and addressing these curious add-ons in the letter.
  • Always ending the value proposition with “Wait, there’s more…”.  
  • Constantly downplaying the perceived effort, resources or skills required. Make the reader feel good enough about the product or service.

Halbert dedicates every section to (1) dispelling a belief; (2) reducing the effort/resources/skill required (= you can surely get this result); (3) stating the benefit and expected result.

He occasionally deviates from this to focus on: (4) secondary benefits; (5) building authority by dropping names or high-end social groups (with/out mentioning names), showing off your results or simply mentioning experience; (6) relating to the reader (“even if you are dead broke like I was!”).

Halbert’s Structure And Style – AIDA

Halbert’s base structure often follows the AIDA format.

  • Attention: An attention-grabbing headline that makes a promise to readers.
  • Interest: A hook that expands on your headline promise — it adds clarity.
  • Desire: Product benefits that entice your reader to buy.
  • Action: An irresistible offer that convinces them to buy now.

Halbert’s structure in detail

  • A heading that evokes curiosity (“reveals”, “secret”), dramatically states a benefit (sometimes with numbers) and indicates expertise
  • Creating intrigue is all about revealing something by (1) contradicting (in a believable manner) a belief or (2) making the reader aware of something unknown.
  • Subheading: evoke curiosity and establish this product as a better solution than what the consumer currently has.
  • Start by describing everyday life. Paint a picture and establish a connection with the reader.
    • Create images for the results and benefits. Example: “Plastic gold mine.”
    • Eliminate big objections & dislikes that are going on in the prospect’s mind & piquing interest to continue reading.
    • Occasionally: After touting credentials, it’s important to reveal his struggles & relate himself to the prospect.
  • Describe the problem. If it evokes negative emotions in the reader, make a statement about a general population.
    • Stress the required effort and limited results with alternative methods.
  • Write in a way that evokes emotions, particularly of pride or belonging to a group. Categorize reader and generalize (failed) attempts. 
    • The reader is assumed to have put in effort but has failed due to forces outside of his/her control. Make the reader feel better about him/herself.
    • Create a common enemy to increase the desire to take action.
  • Address questions the reader has. Include “perceived effort” questions.
  • Let readers know there is an ‘easy’ way that anyone can achieve without giving up current comfort
    • Contrast with earlier alternative solutions when possible.
  • Establish authority of solution & exclusivity.
    • Something has worked for a long time = trust
    • Something has worked for others (with even worse problems) so it must work for us too.
    • Establish expertise of the creator.
    • Drop names of people, organisations or brands people respect. Trust by association. Strengthened when these people “recommend” the solution.
    • Mention adoption by people similar to the reader. Trust by social proof.
    • Exclusivity: everything is always a “secret” that has been around “for a long time” and only now has been “revealed” or “discovered”.
  • Emphasize ease of solution
  • Address uncertainty with certainty, often unbacked by results. Something as simple as “It really works” can be enough.
  • Keep benefits short. If unclear, mention a causal effect that is understandable and beneficial to the reader.
    • Emphasize safety and legality (dispel doubts), effort (“painstaking research”) and results (“nothing short of amazing”)
    • End with noting that it’s legal (address potential issues and distrust), back it up with authority and social proof (“it is encouraged by banks and here is why…”) and that there is no downside risk (“100 per cent insured by US government”)
    • Use future-pacing.
  • Reminder how easily the solution can be used or implemented.
  • No-questions-asked, money-back guarantee. Strengthen it by telling the reader to check it with someone he/she trusts.
  • CTA + what happens next. Take away all uncertainty. End with a reminder of the money-back guarantee.
    • “The publisher guarantees that this book will show you how to at least double the earning power of your money.”
    • Wrap the message with ‘I care for you’ vibes. “I intend to treat you like I would like to be treated!”
    • No-risk: “You can’t lose.”
    • Add urgency where possible.
      • “first-come-first-serve”, “while supplies last” and “our phone lines are often busy” -> play up demand to encourage faster action.
    • Force the reader to make a (reversible) decision.
      • Don’t use “buy” where possible, but substitute it with “you have a watershed decision in front of you now” or “examine it for a full year on a 100% no-risk basis!”. 
      • “Unless you are brain dead or lazy beyond belief this info will make your cash flow explode!”
    • Reframing
      • “Is that a lot of money?” > Not if you think it’s only paper, ink and plastic…but my package contains etc etc
      • Value vs price. 
        • Value: “Generate tens of millions of dollars by several hundred people”
        • Price: “Paid $ 6,250 to attend one of my seminars..ALL of this incredible information for only $ 295.00.”
  • End with a P.S. where possible
    • Use “by the way” when it’s a print ad.
    • Expects the reader to have committed to the purchase.
    • Halbert often breaks up information into two parts, leaving the second (crucial) part until the end.

Halbert’s headlines

  • Number
  • Exaggeration – “Amazing”, “Top”, “Huge”
  • Novelty – “Secret”, “Discover”, “Reveal”
  • Authority – “Ad Expert”
  • Either:
    • Shock – “Even during a recession!”
    • Benefit – “Help you make huge amounts of cash”

Halbert’s subheadings 

These are often on multiple lines, each with a different purpose:

  1. what the product/service/section is about; 
  2. benefit; 
  3. surprise, which can be:
    1. no effort/resources are required; 
    2. applicable to the reader (which he thought was impossible); 
    3. shocking amount/result

Halbert’s common phrases

  • Sentence or section starters:
    • And
    • By the way 
    • Listen (to this)
    • You see 
    • So
    • Not only that 
    • Think about it 
    • Don’t worry
    • Remember
    • Well
  • Anywhere in the text:
    • Believe me (believe it or not)
    • Secret/trick (technique)
    • One of the things (you can do)
    • There is more…
  • At the end of a section:
    • Connect it with the subheading of the next section
  • Often ends sentences with a !

Summary

Start with a reader’s desire.
Package the promised (and desired) results in an interesting, entertaining personal story that builds relatability.
Close with an ask…wait there’s more…a lot more…and a P.S.

Halbert’s Mindset And Keys To Success

“Everyone wants to climb the mountain, but the big difference between those at the top and those still on the bottom is simply a matter of showing up tomorrow to give it just one more shot.” – Gary Halbert

“You must always find a market first… and then concentrate on a product!” 

“The way to deduce what people want to buy is to simply observe what they DO buy!”

Lesson

  • Found something that works? Repurpose it.
  • Test, test, test
  • Sell freebies or money-back offers. Make the first ask a perceived no-cost offer for the customer. Get a (paid) commitment first, get the big bucks later.

Gary Halbert’s “Coat of Arms” Letter

Mike Schauer put this letter into perspective: “This 1-page letter was mailed for more than 30 years to more than 600,000,000 people. In this edition of his newsletter: Gary talks in-depth about the strategy behind it. 

It was his “do or die letter.” He was struggling financially at the time & created a scenario in which his life depended on this letter. He started at the desired result of having the recipient open the mail & read it. From this end, he theorized that the piece couldn’t look like promotional mail. It had to look like personal mail which is why he used a plain envelope hand-addressed & stamped with a single letter inside. On top of this, he targeted specific family names like Macdonald (since he was selling family crests) so he could address letters with their exact name mentioned throughout the letter.”

Because it’s such an amazing sales letter, I’ll share my rough notes of its structure, style and anything else that jumped out to me.

The letter can be swiped at the bottom of the page.

Coat of Arms Notes

  • Not a print ad, but a personal letter
  • Addressed at the person, incl address & phone
  • Written using his wife’s name -> speculation: women appear(ed) less as a salesperson, so increased trust?
  • 6 + 1 paragraphs
    1. Attention-grabbing & personally-relevant “did you know” + historical (“ancient”, “seven centuries ago”) -> shows novelty & effort
    2. Why + how + what
      • Doing it “for friends”. Again, making it more personal, less sales-y and showing benevolence
      • Show effort with “research” and “artist recreate”
      • Reaffirm novelty & historical value
      • Mention product
    3. Detail the product, starting with the personally relevant and interesting benefits: origin, family motto, place in history and famous people who share it
      • Makes people curious
      • And possibly/certainly “being connected to famous people” enhances ego and possibly reputation
      • Drawing is the cherry on top but not the thing most people care about, so he writes it in the middle of the paragraph
      • The final sentence (paper quality) ends with “suitable for framing” to show the utility and how people can use it. Pretty sure he intentionally ends the paragraph with this word. Also subconsciously enhances the “showing off” and “ego boost” features of the report.
    4. Mention the friends one more time (‘we did this to help out others, not to sell a product’) and how “delighted” they were
      • Remember: these friends share the same last name, so readers have something in common with these unknown friends. We like things and people more when we have something in common.
      • Adds “we have had a few extra copies made…to share…with other people of the same name” -> again, this is an extra thing and we’re just being benevolent
    5. Mention the utility again (“framed”), how rare this product is (“we have not traced anyone’s individual family tree”) and how much effort it took (“the earliest [underlined] people”)
      • Start with “Framed,”. Pretty sure this is intentional. The comma creates emphasis. Reaffirms utility and how it can be used. Remember: everyone likes to boast/show off to others.
      • Give readers the option to be benevolent themselves + an added selling option for readers: “they are great gifts for relatives”. Made stronger because it’s for “relatives”, people we care about the most.
      • Plays the scarcity card
      • Mention the effort again: “researched back through several centuries”
    6. The ask + scarcity (“our supply is pretty slim”) + what they need to do
      • What they need to do -> reduce the effort as much as possible. Simply “verify that we have your correct name and address and send the correct amount.”
      • Don’t mention pricing. “enough to cover the added expenses”. What does this mean? At this point, nobody cares anymore cuz they’re too enamoured by the previous paragraphs and their own/family’s legacy.
    7. Add a P.S. in which the pricing is mentioned
      • By this point, the “letter” has ended and the sale has been confirmed.
      • Everybody wants to read the P.S.
  • The entire letter reads as if a purchase is a given. No convincing is done throughout the letter. It’s all about making it relevant to the reader and being perceived as helpful/mindful/benevolent + giving the reader that same opportunity.
  • Every point the letter tries to make is written in one sentence. Paragraphs are at most 3 sentences. Can be read in 1-2 minutes.
  • Paragraph order is very interesting too. A lot of reaffirming going on, without it feeling that way. Vocabulary used throughout the letter is very limited.
    1. Attention-grabbing & personal relevance
    2. Why + how + what
    3. Alternating (paragraph 3-5): utility + benevolence & relevance (social standing)
    4. CTA + reaffirm scarcity
    5. End with pricing…which everyone will read (we all want to read the bottom, especially P.S. since it feels like a secret) -> which confirms & assumes the sale at the same time. Masterful.
  • A high degree of shareability because it’s personally relevant to the reader (want to tell family + friends because it’s interesting and out-of-the-blue) AND to his family. First viral letter?

If you’re interested in hearing Gary explain the 11 “hidden persuaders” in this letter, listen to this MP3 interview of him explaining it all.

This one letter became the foundation of subsequent ads that Halbert turned into a true sales funnel. All ads can be swiped below.

Coat of Arms Funnel

  1. Coat of Arms letter
  2. Use the results to create “Money Making” ad
  3. Use the results of (2) to improve and expand the funnel (increasing commitment slope): 
  1. Lead Gen ad (with a/b testing) 
  2. Famous Dollar Letter
  3. Both reuse the tested & proven copy from (2)

Gary Halbert Swipe File


Lessons From Other Great Writers


3 thoughts on “Gary Halbert – How To Write Copy That Sells”

  1. Pingback: David Ogilvy - How To Write Copy Like The Best

  2. Pingback: Joseph Sugarman - How To Write Addictive Copy

  3. Pingback: Eugene Schwartz - How To Become A Better Copywriter

Comments are closed.