I used to beat myself up throughout the day.
Unintentionally.
But I did.
Many things I wanted to get done.
Had them all written down.
Some were scheduled for specific time slots.
Others weren’t.
In my mind I had allocated time for all of them.
Imagine a house of cards.
Pull out a card from the bottom row.
The structure collapses.
That’s what happened to my schedule.
Every single day.
It didn’t bother me all the time.
But many days it did.
I was playing catch-up the moment the first task took longer than I had planned.
This continued for years.
I was living life happily.
I was working happily.
But I was always thinking about the next thing.
I had my day planned out.
Before it had even started.
I wasn’t living in the present.
I was living in the future, mentally.
It doesn’t work.
Nor does beating yourself up.
It only drains your time and emotional energy.
It’s so simple, yet it doesn’t hit home until you’re ready for it: all we have is the present.
At least that’s what I’ve found.
I still have many things I want to get done in a day.
But I gave up on allocating time.
I prioritize them in order of which I want to have completed the most.
Then simply work down the list one by one.
Never looking ahead anymore.
Focusing on the one thing that’s at the top.
Every evening is a reflection of the day.
Optimizing the list.
Every weekend is a reflection of the week.
Optimizing the process.
Every quarter is a reflection of the 3-month period.
Optimizing the goals and priorities.
Rinse-and-repeat.
A part of me still lives in the future.
Increasingly more is able to live in the present.
Beating myself up?
That’s a thing of the past.