Choose happiness

Talking with your grandparents is a good way to reflect.
They care for you.
They want to know about you.
They have their own opinions and beliefs – which they love to share.

Especially, when you’re unable to see them frequently.
You have to condense what has happened in your life.
Make your thinking clear and succinct.

My recent call proved a good time for reflection.

The biggest change I’ve implemented in my life the past few months is “choosing happiness.”

There are a million things you can be doing.
A million things that bring you closer to your goal.
A million things that don’t bring you closer.
A million things that keep you where you are.

These choices are accompanied by anxiety, doubt and a whole host of negative emotions.
You want to pick the right one.
Don’t have regrets later.

I’ve simplified my life.
What are my goals?
What do I enjoy doing now and in the future?
Tie these two things together.
Now I’m enjoying every minute of every day AND working toward an even better future.

This has also meant some practical changes.

1) No news, including social media.
I was never an avid user of social media.
I did read many newspapers and journals.
In different languages.
One day I just stopped.
Cold turkey.
Life’s been more positive ever since.
I’ve realized that news outlets exaggerate everything and often (have to) play with negative reporting.
I didn’t want that in my life.

2) Reduce time with people that hold me back in any way.
There are 7+ billion people on this planet.
I want to help everyone.
But I can’t do so with my time.

Not everyone matches my current needs, wants and way of life.
That’s okay.
Relationships come and go.
It’s part of life.

You can be respectful and kind without being friends with everyone.
So, rather than spending time with people that don’t add to my life, increase the time with people that do.

3) Increase time with people and things that matter.
Cutting news and people out of your life frees up a lot of time, energy and mental capacity.
I’ve redirected most of it to people that are dear to me.
My relationships have prospered as a result.

The time saved has gone to working on my goals…in ways I enjoy.
Rather than having a shallow understanding of many things, I have a deeper understanding of a few things.
The few things that matter to me.

Worst-case, my friends and family inform me of things I ought to know.

4) Look at myself and what I control.
It doesn’t save much time, but it does so, so, so much for overall happiness and mental health.
Gone are the days of frustration, anger, sadness, hesitation, doubt.

Something not going my way?
Step 1: What could I have done differently?
Step 2: What can I learn from this?
Step 3: What can I do now?
Step 4: Take action

So simple, yet so effective.

It doesn’t mean every action is the right one.
The most effective one.
The most efficient one.

It does guarantee learning, progress and a sense of control.
In any situation.
Happiness is a choice.
It’s what I’ve chosen.